To Mark Halperin, It Is Probably Also a Mystery How His Shoes Get Tied

Mark Halperin, Senior Political Correspondent for Time magazine and MSNBC, consummate Beltway Insider, best known for his access to Establishment Politicians, writes a "memo."

FROM: Mark Halperin

TO: Coastal Elites, the Media and Establishment Politicians of Both Parties

RE: Sarah Heath Palin

And this isn't even the most amazing incidence of Halperin's dizzying lack of anything remotely resembling self-awareness. This is:

Don't underestimate Sarah Palin. Yes, she is hyper-polarizing: she sends her fans into rapture and drives her detractors stark raving mad. But she can dominate the news cycle with a single tweet and generate three days of coverage with a single speech (as she did this past Friday in Iowa). Her name recognition is universal.

Well, gee whiz, Mark Halperin of Time magazine and MSNBC and perpetrator of a widely-read crib sheet for influential DC media insiders, it sure is a total unfathomable mystery how Sarah Palin so often drives the news cycle! However does she do it!

Halperin basically proves that according to actual polling data everybody in the country thinks Palin is a shyster dingbat, with the key exceptions of idiot wingnuts and, well, Mark Halperin. And then he says that between them they just might make her Leader of the Free World, or at least a major party's candidate for the gig.

So, hooray for the Liberal Media! The Snowbilly Empress may be naked, but Halperin thinks she's hawt.

The Funny Punchline to the joke is in Halperin's comments, where this sort of response is typical:

Mark Halperin,  the Odeous Mark Halperin, you are soon to be in the Minority...  The hatred people have for people of your ilk and socialist government is growing..

When the inmates finally take over the asylum and attach the electrodes to Halperin's frank n beans, he's going to be typing a heartfelt ode to their Heartland Values on his Blackberry.