I bet you didn't know that Bill Clinton masterminded the fraud that got Barack Obama elected in order to nominate a Supreme Court justice who will cover up once and for all Clinton's role in training the Iraqi agent who brainwashed Tim McVeigh into the Oklahoma City bombing. Every day you learn something new!
In this vein, hello, Chuck Norris, what wisdom have you for us today?
One day, we will wake up to discover that the U.S. has signed a global treaty that will prohibit any transfer of firearm ownership, force reductions in the number of firearms privately owned and eventually eradicate the planet of guns for law-abiding citizens. Of course, the criminals will still illegally have their guns. And on that day, if you do not comply with that global treaty, you will be fined and face imprisonment.
As an inhabitant of the Planet of Guns, Chuck Norris fears eradication via the mechanism of a global treaty, a special kind of treaty that gets signed in the night.
Gosh, Chuck Norris, I gotta say, this sounds an awful lot like a fictitious story or a false warning...
This is not a fictitious story or false warning.
Holy shit! It's real!
As sure as government health care has been shoved down our throats, so will the barrels of our guns.
Always with the throat-shoving, these guys. But how will this antidemocratic global treaty gun-taking be accomplished...?
via the election and work of an antigun president
Via an election! Hitler was elected too, you know, and the first thing Hitler did? Ban guns! These are very true Internet facts! Ergo: Obama is worse than Hitler. Hitler lacked, as Chuck Norris points out, "the funding of an anti–Second Amendment movement by billionaire progressives like George Soros." And it's true! Everywhere you look, there's a well-funded agent of the Anti-Second Amendment Movement poised & ready to snatch away your gun, in the manner of a Rabbit continually attempting to leave you bereft of your Trix. It's all tied together.
Anyhow we know Obama's coming after your guns, because it's scientifically proven by scientific statistics:
No wonder a Gallup poll in October 2009 revealed that 41 percent of all Americans and 52 percent of gun owners believe that Obama will try eventually to ban the sale of guns.
Holy shit! Gun nuts are overwhelmingly nuts about guns! They are cookoo for ammo puffs! As it were! Because you could never get an entire 41% of Americans to believe just any sort of crazy shit -- just, you know, right-wing crazy shit. Over on our side we have about the same percentage believing in evolution, so it all balances out pretty finely.
Chuck Norris then tells us about CIFTA, a proposed law so insidiously anti-American, it has a Spanish acronym. Heck, it's so awful, the NRA tells us that
The treaty does include language suggesting that it is not intended to restrict "lawful ownership and use" of firearms.
Of course the NRA opposes it anyway, because if they aren't making gun nuts paranoid, the people who run the NRA would need to go out and get a real job. It's a pretty good gig, if you can get it -- all you have to do is wind up people like Chuck Norris, who are pretty tightly wrapped anyhow, and not a little bit silly. Quoth Chuck Norris:
NRA might mean National Rifle Association, but it also means to me, "Never Remove (your) Arms."
So he's not very good with acronyms and won't put down his shotgun even while pooping. But that doesn't make him crazy! This makes him crazy:
In fact, by way of fair warning for any would-be burglars that break into my house, I hope they read the sign on my front porch first: "We don't dial 9-1-1 here."
I'm sure. I know I'd hate to be the law enforcement agent who comes to Chuck Norris's door to ask about all the dead bodies stacked up on his porch. Why, that maniac has a gun!