Scott may feel compelled to defend Jeter, but that doesn't mean the Yankee-hating universe doesn't have anything to cheer over:
Two uniformed cops who ejected a Red Sox fan from Yankee Stadium last summer when he tried to use the bathroom
during "God Bless America" have cost NYC taxpayers some $20,000 in
settlement money. But the good news is that Yankee Stadium will now
allow attendees relieve themselves during the Seventh Inning stretch!
You'll recall that last August,
one Brad Campeau-Laurion refused to obey an NYPD officer who ordered
him back to his seat when he tried to use the bathroom as "God Bless
America" played. According to Campeau-Laurion, two officers then
forcefully threw him out, with one of the officers telling him to
"leave the country if he didn’t like it." In the wake of 9/11, Yankee
stadium began requiring spectators to remain in their seats during
patriotic songs, in some cases extending chains to block the ends of the aisles. But after a lawsuit filed by the NYCLU over "enforced patriotism," a settlement was reached
yesterday whereby Campeau-Laurion gets $10,001 from the city, the NYCLU
gets $12,000 for legal fees, and baseball fans are granted the liberty
to micturate at will.
Talk about lawsuits you deserve to lose. It should have been a lot more. Patriotism: in the name of Liberty, we forbid you to pee! Truly this is what the Revolution was fought over, the self-evident right of the wealthy owners of sports teams to use state law enforcement to ban unpatriotic piss-taking.
The good news is that now this guy won his ten grand, he just might be able to afford a ticket to Yankee Stadium to actually exercise these hard-won pee privileges, with possibly even just enough left over to pay for a beer to help him fill up first.
In celebration here's GBV covering a classic Strokes tune.