Rifle Games for 40 Year Olds, What a Drag

Erick the Son of Erick, and --  the fuck...?

I have an endearing soft spot for Lamar! Alexander.

No, actually, you don't. None of your "soft spots" are "endearing," particularly when these soft spots involve Lamar Alexander. Please stop this fail. Holy shit you won't and insist upon continuing to speak. I weep for America.

Having grown up overseas, I was never familiar with guns. In college, while he was campaigning for President, Lamar! came through Georgia on the campaign trail. I got to go with him to a skeet shooting event. It was my first time sheet shooting. I did horribly. But Lamar taught me how to hold, load, and handle a shot gun.

Did you get any swallow when Lamar was shooting your sheets? (Also, one has to admire the Son of Erick's daringly incompetent placement of the dangling modifier before the main clause in that second sentence. The golf claps, my friends, are heartfelt. Erick, he dangles, daringly.)

Sometimes we have to smack down our friends who wander off the reservation. I always hate knocking Lamar!, but lately he’s been deserving of several fists of conservative anger to the face.

This is less bananas in the original Brownshirt, perhaps.

Hogan rightly knocks him again today for going all Lindsey on us and supporting Sotomayor.

I guess he heard about the other Lindsay showing up on the doorstep of her lesbian lover, having a breakdown, and ol’ Lamar! got confused and decided to stick up for Graham.

Further proof that Erick the son of Erick is a fucking asshole. Also there are lies about how coal! is the nation's energy independence future.

These vicious know-nothings are the Loyal Opposition. I know it seems grim, but I enjoin you -- patient study of these creatures will pay off.

Sure, they will probably be able to destroy Civilization as We Know It through climate change inaction and insane foreign policy, but after that, they'll most likely kill themselves off trying to rediscover fire, at which point we'll finally be able to get rid of the filibuster and the Electoral College. I don't see a downside.