by Ripley
If you watched the debate tonight - or listened to it, as I did - one theme stands clear: John McCain knows something. Wait, let me re-type that with the proper deference and astoundyness.
John McCain knows some motherfucking shit about the motherfucking topics that relate to the fucking world your sorry motherfucking asses are living in... motherfuckers!
At least, that's what I gathered from his easy, breezy comments that always seemed to swirl down the Republican bowl to "I know [shit, Shinola, and possibly asses from elbows about the given topic]" I shouldn't be surprised - after all, McCain's been saying he "knows" stuff for quite some time.
He knows how to win wars. He has a secret plan! Fortunately, for someone, he's too smart to reveal his secret plan to George W. Bush and the DoD, and miss out on the glory a guy gets when he wins a war.
He knows Foreign Policy. Enh, let's skip that one... seriously.
He knows Finance and Economy. What with all the saving and the loaning and the flayven and the hoyven!
He knows War and Veterans' issues. Look, maybe it's time we stopped coddling these free-loading bastards. It's time for dead and wounded soldiers to stand up, stand up, stand up and fight! for John McCain's campaign instead of lying in their beds and, well... doing whatever they're doing that's reflecting poorly on his record of POW/MIA, wounded veterans. Also, Iran! Iran! Iran!!
He knows [health care, poverty, infrastructure, education, take your pick] and you'd better believe he's ready to tell you that he knows about it. Smooth word to your Mother, kids!
Well, I'm convinced. I firmly believe that John McCain thinks he knows something. And if he doesn't know it, I'm sure Sarah Palin will step in and, uh... hey, did you hear that Schlitz is brewing their original recipe again? I've heard it tastes great, so you know I'll be checking that out.
What, you were expecting Lynrd Skynrd?
Rip -