A standard if crazed talking point, this time via Think Progress:
SEC. RUMSFELD: Oh, I don’t know. You know, I thought about [if Iraq were in a civil war] last night, and just musing over the words [civil war], the phrase, and what constitutes it. If you think of our Civil War, this is really very different. If you think of civil wars in other countries, this is really quite different. There is - there is a good deal of violence in Baghdad and two or three other provinces, and yet in 14 other provinces there’s very little violence or numbers of incidents. So it’s a - it’s a highly concentrated thing.
It's true. The American Civil War was never directly fought in New York and never really made it to Vermont. And there were only like two battles in Florida, or something like that. So it was never actually any big deal. That's obvious.
But Rumsfeld is being too modest here. If we extend this sort of geographical logic, we can see that, indeed, George W. Bush has brought peace to the Middle East!
There's no war in Saudi Arabia, Kuwait, or the UAE, and there have been no naval engagements at all in the Persian Gulf for years.
Bush is the greatest peacemaker since Gandhi, obviously.
Or Genghis Khan, who brought peace and tranquility to Kansas.